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STOP PRESS! The Saucy Flapdragons have emerged from winter hibernation and have already played for the great and good at some very select private functions, including the eagerly awaited 2010 staff Christmas party for the good folks at Rhino- in March 2012! Diary management courses all round. The band has also been paid NOT to play for Ardingly School in June. Having booked the band whilst on an absinthe binge, the organiser was overcome with remorse when he realised what he had done. After minimal involvement from m'learned friends, money changed hands and he was duly let off the hook. Let's just hope he learns from the near miss. Not such good news for the long-suffering population of Plumpton however. The otherwise perfectly pleasant Winning Post has once again been compromised due to Scouse Neil's inability to properly secure the premises. On Saturday 2nd June over the bank holiday weekend, the pub will once again be overrun by undesirables, ne'er-do-wells and ruffians playing their loud music without any regard for the consequences and the now-compulsory throwing of flimsy female underwear. Entry will be free of charge, although there may be a sizeable charge for those wishing to leave the premises. Bawdy and generally licentious behaviour will be required, including dancing far too close for decorum to the least hirsute guitarist. As people will have Sunday, Monday AND Tuesday to recover, there are real concerns for public safety and all police leave has been cancelled!




NEXT GIG

Sat 2 June
Winning Post, Plumpton
All Welcome

Sat 16 June
St Wilfrids School, Burgess Hill
Entry by ticket only- please contact the school for information on 01444 235254


The Saucy Flapdragons are officially the most fun you can have with your clothes on. According to the British Skin Foundation, regular application can reduce visible signs of ageing, resolve the Middle-East crisis and provide a credible Plan B for the government's economic strategy.

Faced with accusations that the band was "overhyped", impressario Simon Cowell insisted that there was no reason why the Flapdragons could not carry on their meteoric rise and outsell the Beatles. Cowell commented "The Saucy Flapdragons are living proof that if you get the chemicals right anything is possible".

Between world tours, new album releases, artistic differences and live sessions on Radio 4, the hardest working band since Spinal Tap are still available for private parties, weddings and corporate events. So if you think you're cool enough, your flares wide enough and your platforms high enough, maybe you should book the Saucy Flapdragons. Oh go on. Please.